he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Randomize
