You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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