So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Randomize
