my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
