Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize
