Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
a search helicopter?!
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
