Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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