haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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