Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
