no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize