HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
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