what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Randomize