ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Randomize
