break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Randomize
