I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
Randomize
