Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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