Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Randomize
