walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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