So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Randomize
