As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize