If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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