mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
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