kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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