you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
50% drunk capacity currently
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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