She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
