I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
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