If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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