He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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