I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Randomize
