somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
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