I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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