oh god the rape fog is back!
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
you never un-have a 4some
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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