and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
