YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
