It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
