did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
