Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize