There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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