So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
