i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
