If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
