So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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