whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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