she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Randomize
