are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
