So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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