summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
where are my eyebrows?
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
