We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize