your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
