My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Randomize
