you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Randomize
